wine tastes so bad. I’m convinced the whole world is in on an inside joke together trying to persuade me that wine tastes good to them. there’s no way any one can like the taste of it. it’s like bug spray. the whole frickin world pretends to like bug spray. I don’t understand why. stop the madness
Date a guy who opens your jars and wine bottles for you
"please. please stop opening all my jars and wine bottles. I’m not ready for them yet. you’re just letting it all go bad. my whole house smells like wine and pickles and I can’t live like this"